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How To Deal With Noisy Neighbors Upstairs [Stop the Stomping!]

Picture of Shaun M

Shaun M

Table of Contents

A brief intro from Shaun about noisy upstairs neighbors - enjoy the noise 🙂

How to deal with noisy upstairs neighbors

This article is about noisy neighbors upstairs and how to deal with them.

Noisy neighbors come in many forms including:

  • loud music penetrating the walls
  • heavy-footed neighbors upstairs stomping around
  • A neighbor with a loud barking dog
  • Shouters: Individuals or couples that are constantly screaming at the top of their lungs

I’m sure you have a few examples of your own, right? Of course, feel free to share them in the comments below!

noisy-upstairs-neighbors

Noisy neighbors upstairs can rare their ugly heads at any point. Maybe you have been living in the building for years and they just move in on top of you. OR maybe you inadvertently moved underneath them. 

Either way, the ongoing disturbance emanating from above can create an ugly situation. 

Of course, you could always pack up and move to be done with the obtrusive sounds. However, fortunately for you, there are some easier, faster, and more effective ways to fix the noisy neighbor problem. 

Besides, better the devil you know, right?!?

That said if you do talk to your noisy neighbor be nice. Try and approach them with a positive frame of mind. If you go in thinking that they will be annoying in the conversation you might just send the conversation in that direction yourself. 

Remember you get more bees with honey… 

Maybe they truly don’t realize how the noise penetrates the walls of the apartment. Maybe they don’t realize the noise from jumping around upstairs is so loud.

bad-neighbors-will-react-better-to-a-positive-frame-of-mind

Give your noisy neighbor some honey

I don’t mean literally! 

TIP NUMBER 1: Be kind to the noisy person next door. Kill them with kindness!

Have you heard the saying you get more bees with honey? 

Treat your nuisance neighbor with kindness, respect, empathy and honesty. Doing this will yield significantly more favorable results, I 100% guarantee. 

Trust me I know. I used to scream and shout when I wanted to be heard. The more I needed to be heard the noisier I would get. But you know what?!? The results were never positive. 

SO, I decided to take the “HONEY” approach. Ever since my interactions with annoying people have improved. 

If you have a noisy neighbor put on your best smile, maybe you should buy them some actual honey, and go talk to them. Here are some more tips on how to deal with noisy apartment neighbors.

Upstairs Neighbors

Do you have noisy neighbors upstairs stomping around? Maybe a loud stereo is coming from noisy neighbors downstairs. 

Noise can come from either upstairs or downstairs. And there are different solutions to the noise depending on if its coming from above or below. 

Because there are different solutions noise issues depending on where they are coming from I believe it is important to focus. 

Therefore, today we will are going on focus on loud upstairs neighbors and what you can do about them stomping around up there. 

Are you ready for some peace and quiet?

upstairs-neighbors-stomping

Upstairs neighbors stomping around

Upstairs neighbors stomping around can transmit noise easily into your apartment. Stomping from above can sound like someone is playing a drum right on top of your head! Or maybe it feels like a herd of elephants live up there. 

If there is a bunch of raining down on you from abve the first thing you need to do is find out the source of the noise? 

Does your upstairs neighbor wear work boots inside? OR maybe they are into CrossFit and that’s what all the banging around is. 

Either way the stomping noise from above has to stop. 

So what to do now?

Address the elephant in the room

address-the-elephant-in-the-room

To address the elephant in the room I am not suggesting you get  call animal control.

No, instead I am telling you that you need to literally go upstairs, knock on your neighbors door and talk to them. 

Talking to your noisy neighbor

Whenever there is any conflict the conversation can go sideways.  Talking to your neighbor sounds like a good idea but things can be said that shouldn’t be. 

Because people get upset when they talk about problems, or feel accused, the issue is often not resolved. Instead people are just more upset and polarized in their position. 

So, when you talk to your neighbor about the noise issue it is important to have a plan. 

Key points for your conversation

Please read this carefully because if you can nail this conversation, all of your noise complaints could be resolved instantly!

This is how you talk to your noisy neighbor. The steps to talking effectively with a noisy neighbor are:

  • Politely introduce yourself and your proximity to them. You could say, “Hi, my name is Shaun and I live downstairs. How are you today?”
  • Identify the noise issue at hand. For example, “I live downstairs from you and noise is often transmitted from your home to mine.”
  • Suggest a reason for the problem. Blame the “MAN”, blame the building. BUT NEVER EVER BLAME YOUR NEIGHBOR! The noise comes through easily probably because the walls are paper thin and the landlord doesn’t give a damn)
  • Offer a solution
Now you know how to talk to a noisy neighbor, what’s next?

Best tips to stop the stomping noises

Tip Number 1: Tell them to quit it! (with honey and a smile remember 🙂

Ask the neighbor upstairs to stop stomping! It could be that simple. Simply letting them know that the floors are super thin might be enough. 

Once your neighbor knows there is an issue they may try really hard to be more quiet. 

That would be great, right?

slippers could stop neighbors stomping noise

Remove the shoes

Telling them that walking in work boots sends noise down to your home might result in them removing them when they are home. 

The simple solution of removing shoes when home could be a huge win for you, right?

Now for it to really become a WIN WIN situation…

Follow this up by presenting them with a gift. A nice idea and gesture would be to buy them a soft, comfortable, pair of slippers. The slippers will do several things including:

  1. You gave them something, they may now feel obligated to give you something in return (i.e. a quiet place to live)
  2. Trading heavy boots for soft slippers means less stomping.
  3. You have created a sense of neighborly caring and sharing. This will in turn make for a quieter neighbor – I PROMISE!
  4. Give you peace and quiet for a very small cost

 No matter what you do, always be super friendly and honest. This will give you the best chance of coming up with a solution for all the clumping noise from above.

Insulate to stop sound transmission

The second tip to stop a noisy neighbor upstairs is to insulate the floor. Insulating the floor will prevent noise transmission significantly.

Of course, this could become a terribly expensive project. THink adding insulation between the floors. This is most commonly blown in.

However, there is a much cheaper and easier way. The easiest way to do this is with carpet or area rugs. 

insulate-to-stop-sound-transmission

The thicker the rug the better. To double down you could suggest a thick nonslip pad underneath the rug. There are 2 really big wins by adding a nice rug to stop the noise.

  1. The rug acts as a sound barrier, absorbs the noise, and prevents it from moving from their apartment into yours. No matter how much stomping your neighbor does you will be able to enjoy a quiet evening in.
  2. Your noisy neighbor gets a sweet rug that not only looks cool but feels nice underfoot. 

A further benefit is now your next-door neighbor has a plush area rug, they may be more likely to remove their heavy work boots (which we agree will definitely reduce the noise). I think we have a WIN WIN WIN sound reduction situation!

Schedule the loud sounds

Another idea to reduce the noise coming from above would be to compromise. 

If the noise is from a loud tv then maybe they would be willing to watch on at a certain time. If the banging and crashing are from a workout session then that could be scheduled too. 

This can be a simple, elegant, and effective solution, Talk about hours of the day that would be the best time for them to jump around or play loud music. 

Remember compromise is key and you need to encourage great neighborly relationships if you want the sound pollution to stop. 

So, maybe when they are working out that is a time for you to exit the apartment and get a coffee? Just an idea…

Hopefully, this conversation yields great results. In fact, you will probably find out that your neighbor had no idea about the noise that was being transmitted down into your home. 

Once you point it out and offer some ideas your loud lounge may become a place of silent tranquility immediately. 

2 neighbors that worked out the noise problem by talking [A true story]

I live in a duplex which has a shared wall. My neighbors have children that need quiet time for their daily naps. 

I am not a particularly noisy person however on occasion I might do a little handyman stuff around the house. This meant I was using power tools and hammers. It’s easy to create a lot of noise with some power tools and a hammer.

I had no idea the sound was transmitting through to my neighbors sons bedroom. Which was problem when he was trying to take a nap.

My neighbor gave me a call to talk about the noise. He was very matter of fact as he explained what was going on. 

He then offered up a solution. Nap time was the same time each and everyday. Would it be possible to be quieter during this time. It was actually a really nice talk. 

After this friendly talk we agreed that midday to 1 pm was quiet time. AND at the end of the day I would do my best to eliminate loud noises after 730 pm. 

I wanted to share this as evidence that talking to your neighbor about the noise issue can really solve the problem. 

Noise cancelling headphones

noise-cancelling-headphones

Noise-canceling headphones are fantastic for eliminating unwanted sounds in any environment. They are very capable of stopping the noise created by your noisy upstairs neighbor.

A second electronic solution to cancel out neighborly noises is a noise-canceling machine. Not exactly sure how they work (something about sound wave integration). But when you turn it on all the noise seems to disappear. 

These are 2 solutions that you can do without involving your neighbor. These would be particularly useful if talking with them did not produce the quiet times you desire. 

Earplugs can help to

Noise-canceling headphones are nice for so many reasons. But they come at a high price. If you want a cheap solution I highly recommend you pop along to your local hardware store and get some earplugs.

Earplugs are an extremely effective method to decrease the noise you hear from upstairs. Simply pop them in your ears when you desire some quiet time.

Earplugs are a fast, simple, and cost effective way of solving loud footsteps, stomping or any other noise coming from upstairs. TRY IT!

How to deal with upstairs neighbors stomping and other noises [A quick summary]

Let’s quickly summarize what we have learned to date. I myself have been in a number of living conditions where my upstairs neighbor was making a lot of noise and therefore know that these strategies work. 

Strategies to significantly shrink sound from someone above you. 

  1. Talk to them about the noise they are creating
  2. Be kind and empathetic
  3. Never blame the noise directly on the neighbor. Instead blame “The Man” or the building.
  4. Ask them to remove shoes AND buy them some nice slippers to wear instead. 
  5. Suggest they install a rug or carpet (if they rent maybe their landlord would do this for them).
  6. Buy some noise-canceling headphones or a sound canceling machine. 

These ideas are proven to help reduce loud noises coming from your upstairs neighbors. I know this because I have used them myself. 

None of these ideas will stop the noise 100% of the time. Nothing in life is guaranteed.

So what to do about loud upstairs neighbors that are still being loud?

Here is another extremely effective way communicate with your loud neighbor to address the issue at hand.  

Letter to neighbor about noise

letter-to-noisy-neighbor-above

Writing a letter to your neighbor about noise is a great way to address the situation. A letter can be:

  •  non-confrontational while explaining the situation.
  • It gives you the opportunity to say all the right things and none of the wrong things. 
  • An added bonus is that it gives your neighbor time to digest the information without you being up in their face. 

Writing a letter may be your best solution. Particularly if you do not like confrontation. However, before you post them a note I have 3 very important things to say.

  1. It is important you do not rush the letter writing. Take your time to carefully craft the right things to say. 
  2. Kill them with kindness and always be polite. 
  3. Do not blame your neighbor for the noise directly. 
  4. Offer solutions to solve the noise problem that is both easy and practical.

So how do you write a letter to noisy neighbors? 

This section gets into the nuts and bolts about several letter writing topics:

  1. When you should write a letter instead of talking to them directly. 
  2. How to write a letter to noisy neighbors (spoiler alert… BE POLITE)
  3.  What you should (and shouldn’t) say in the letter
  4. Sample letter to neighbor about noise (I am giving you a letter addressed to your neighbor about the noise. You just need to add your name). 

When is a letter better than talking face to face?

If you have a noisy neighbor the fastest way to get the problem fixed is to talk with them. However, sometimes a face to face is not possible, or may not be the best course of action. 

The most obvious reason for writing to your noisy neighbor is because they are never there when you are ready to talk to them. If this is the case, next time you go upstairs to talk about the noise have your letter with you. If they do not answer you can tape the letter to their door. 

You dont like confrontation

Not everybody is good at conflict resolution. I know I am not! Therefore talking to my neighbor about noises they are making terrifies me! 

If you are the same as me then you too might want to write a letter to your neighbor. A well-written letter can solve the problem in a mutually beneficial manner. 

AND the best part, you don’t have to complain about them to their face, RIGHT?

Emotions are running too high

Another example of when you should write a letter to your neighbor about the noise is if you are an emotional person. Writing a letter can be a better option because you can take your time to say what you should and exclude what you shouldn’t. 

Because you are sitting at home in a controlled environment, you will be able to keep your emotions in check. You won’t in up in a screaming match with your neighbor. You will be able to get your point across which in turn should mean less noise.

How to write a letter to loud neighbors (and not piss them off!)

SPOILER ALERT: Be Polite

If you are writing a letter to your neighbor to address the noise issue you must be kind and polite.

Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine coming home after a hard day of work to find a letter taped to your door. You open it only to be inundated with a rude obnoxious complaint as to how noisy you are and that you must do immediately. How would you react?

If it were me I would probably start stomping around, boots and all. You too?

The letter must be polite and kind [more bees with honey]

Research shows that you are more likely to get what you want if you are polite, kind, factual, and transparent when trying to resolve a problem.

BE POLITE: It is really hard to get upset with someone if they are polite. Therefore when you right to your neighbor, expressing your concern about the disturbances it is imperative that you are polite and respectful. However, don’t confuse being polite with making the letter to formal. I highly suggest that you use your neighbors name instead of Dear Sir/Madam.

Here’s an example of how your polite and kind letter could start:

Hi James,

This is Shaun from downstairs (Unit A101). I hope you are well. I want to talk to you about an issue that I am having. This is something that involves both us. It revolves around just how gosh darn thin the floors are in this building.  

 

What should (and shouldn't) the letter say

The first thing the letter should say is who you are and what your relationship is to the person you are writing to e.g. “Hi my name is Shaun and I live downstairs from you.”

Next, you should tell your neighbor why you are writing:

“I am writing because the floors in this building are very thin and there is a lot of noise transmission between apartments.”

When writing about the noise issue be tactful. In the example above I blame the thin floors. I believe this is much better than writing the following:

“I am writing because every time you come home you stomp around upstairs, make a bunch of noise and it has to stop now! Your footsteps are so loud you sound like an elephant!”

What do you think?

Provide your noisy neighbor with a solution

The next step in writing to your loud neighbor is to offer a solution. The solution must be easy (and cheap) for your noisy neighbor to implement. If the solution is simple and cheap then it is more likely to be successful. Does that make sense?

So what might a solution look like if you have noisy upstairs neighbors stomping around every time they come home?

Here is a possible solution to reduce stomping, clomping and all general heavy-footed-ness

I would write: 

“Because the floors are so thin it is very easy for me to hear you walking around upstairs. (NOTE that I did not use the words stomping, clumping, or banging around as they all sound so negative).  There are some simple things that can be done to reduce the transmission of sound from your house to mine. I would be so grateful if you might consider one of them. 

I looked up online and found the top 3 solutions for reducing foot traffic noise from above.The most commonly prescribed solutions by the internet are:

  1. remove shoes when inside
  2. Wear slippers/soft shoes when inside
  3. Get carpet or rugs installed. 

Carpet is easily the most expensive but super effective. On the other end, a nice pair of slippers are way more budget-friendly. AND research has shown a good pair of slippers can reduce noise transmission almost as much as carpet. 

So what’s next?

The followup

The follow-up called also be called the summary.

At the end of the letter re-iterate the problem, offer up the best solution, and ask them if they would be able to give it a go.

It is very important that you ask them for their help. Don’t just assume they understand.

Asking for help in a letter could look like this:

“I was wondering if I could buy you a nice pair of slippers or indoor shoes to wear when you come home. It would mean a great deal to me if you would be willing to give it a shot.”

So should we put it all together now?

The sign off

You do not need to be cute or fancy here. A simple kind and respectful ending to the letter will suffice. 

For example:

Thanks for reading my letter. I understand this about the building and not about you. I am truly grateful for your efforts and will absolutely help out as I can. Please let me know you got this letter so I don’t bother you with another letter on your door.

Sincerely from your neighbor downstairs

Shaun

Sometimes I try and be funny, however, be careful. You need to be careful because you will not be there to explain the joke. The worst thing that could happen is a joke is misconstrued as an insult. 

Shall we put it all together now?

Sample letter to neighbor about noise

Dear neighbor (use their name if you can)

My name is Shaun. You live upstairs from me.

As you probably know, the walls and floors in this building are paper thin. Because of this when any of us move around it can be heard in the adjacent units.

When it comes to foot traffic most of the noise is transmitted to the apartment below.

I  have done some research online and have found the 3 most common solutions to reduce noise from walking are:

  1. Install carpet or area rugs.
  2. Remove heavy shoes and workboots when inside.
  3. Wear indoor shoes AKA slippers.

Of these, I think the easiest (and most comfy) is wearing slippers. AND I was wondering if you might be willing to work with me on this.  I did some more research and found a bunch of super sweet slippers that are both comfortable and great for reducing sound.

Would you be willing to meet with me to go over which ones I could buy for you?

I really appreciate your consideration of this. I know the building construction is not your fault. Hopefully, I can return the favor somehow in the future.

Sincerely

Your neighbor downstairs.

Shaun

What do you think about that letter? I invite you to comment below. 

Now imagine you have gone through all of these steps to address your noise concerns with your neighbor but nothing changes.

What can you do now?

Escalation tactics for neighbor that refuses to be quiet

In a perfect world, you will talk to your neighbor about the noise. The conversation will go swimmingly. Your neighbor will try really hard to stop stomping around and reduce the noise they are creating. You may even become best friends and ride unicorns together. Well, now thats going a bit far but you get my drift.

Unfortunately, the world is not perfect. AND there is a chance your noisy upstairs neighbor won’t give a damn! Your neighbor may completely ignore your complaints about the noise. OR WORSE, they may increase the jumping, stomping, and clomping just to spite you!

So what do you do know?

How do you deal with a noisy neighbor upstairs who just won quit?

Reach Out to Some Sort of Housing Authority

Dealing with bad neighbors sometimes requires a form of intervention, especially if chatting with them does not work.

Depending on your situation, you may need to reach out to a condo board, home owner’s association, or your apartment’s landlord or complex’s owner.

If what your neighbor is doing is in violation of some sort of rule or law of a housing association, you may need to make a formal grievance and have a hearing. It’s not a fun step to take, but it’s sometimes required as a way to deal with bad or especially noisy neighbors. 

Research the Rules

Most cities have noise ordinances that dictate noise levels that are unlawful at certain times of the day. Neighborhood associations may have their own, but very specific, rules.

If your neighbors are blasting loud music late at night or regularly having parties that last until 3 a.m. every Saturday, they may be in violation of a neighborhood rule or even your town’s laws.

Before accusing them, do a little research. Consult with your apartment complex or homeowner’s association about all of their bylaws or call your town to review current noise ordinances.

Much of a town’s rules for noise and other behavior can also be found online or in libraries.

Call the Police

Look, it’s not a phone call any neighbor wants to make, but sometimes getting the police involved with a situation is your only option.

Whether you’ve had repeated run-ins with a neighbor, tried to talk to them about a problem before with no resolution, or dealing with a situation out of your control, such as a loud party that just will not stop, sometimes it’s best to take yourself out of the equation and call the law to shut things down.

The approach avoids confrontations to may turn physical and may help prevent further instances anonymously.

Warn Your Neighbors of Impending Action

Another option for dealing with bad and noisy neighbors if talking to them about the issue is getting nowhere is talking to them about what will be the next steps if you can’t come to an understanding. It’s not a threat, just a statement of fact. 

If your neighbors, for example, refuse to turn down the noise or pick up their trash or clean up after their dog, tell them what you’ll be doing next, whether it’s contacting the town or neighborhood association, and tell them the exact rule or law they’re violating.

This will show them that you’re not just serious about the problem but that you’ve done your homework.

They may still put up a fight, but they also may stop the behavior on their own. If not, they probably will when an authoritative party gets involved — and they won’t be surprised when it goes to that step.

Get Other Neighbors Involved

It’s one thing for you to complain or voice a concern, but it’s another if your concern is shared by the majority of your neighbors.

Chances are if you are impacted negatively by a neighbors behavior, there are others near you who are trying to deal with the bad neighbor as well. 

Talk to your neighbors about the problem and see if they share the same concerns or perhaps have additional concerns and similar negative interactions with them.

You can either have an informal neighborhood meeting or conversation with the bad neighbor or approach the neighborhood association, police, or town officials together to present the problem, the steps you all collectively have attempted to take, and the result.

The sheer number of complainants will reinforce how concerning the issue is and may make others more compelled to deal with the bad neighbor quickly and efficiently.

Keep a Log of All the Issues

When dealing with a bad or noisy neighbor, it helps to document all the issues, complete with details of the situation and the steps you took to resolve each one.

This way, you have a timeline of not just bad behavior but all of your attempts to resolve the issue. Such a log can outline just how bad the behavior is and how it has impacted you.

For example, how many times your neighbor has had ridiculously loud parties, how many times you’ve had to speak with them about any type of less-than-neighborly behavior — and how they reacted to it.

In writing, you will have an air-tight diary of everything going on and how you’ve tried endlessly to deal with a bad neighbor to present the complete picture to anyone else who needs to get involved. 

Hire a Mediator

If the issue isn’t big — or unlawful — enough to get police or neighborhood associations involved, or talking with your neighbor yourself is going nowhere. Consider a professional mediator trained to facilitate issues between neighbors.

It often helps to have a neutral party hear both sides, start conversations between the two, and offer suggestions about the motivations and feelings about both sides.

Mediators may be a last resort, but they may be your best bet for dealing with a bad neighbor. 

In fact, a mediator could be a solution for any type of neighborly issue like:

how to ignore noisy neighbors

At wits end and just need to sell?

Noisy neighbors stomping around upstairs is actually a common reason for people needing to sell in a hurry. Of course, there are many ways to get a home sold but only one way that guaranteed fast cash today!

Can I sell a house with noisy neighbors upstairs?

You can sell a house with noisy neighbors upstairs. Just like you can sell a house that is next to a busy freeway or loud airport.

However, just lie if you are living next to an airport or buzzing powerlines you may have to discount the property to get it sold. 

Now you may be wondering if you should just not tell the person who wants to buy your house about the sound problem, BUT…

Do I have to tell buyers about noisy neighbors?

Yes, you do have to tell buyers about your noisy neighbors that live upstairs. Besides, if it were you wouldn’t you want to be told?

When you are selling any type of real estate you are legally required to disclose any issue with the property. This includes noise problems. Therefore if you have a noisy neighbor you have to tell potential buyers about the problem.

This means if you are selling an apartment, condo or home and your neighbors upstairs are noisy you have to tell the potential buyers. IT IS THE LAW!

In fact, there are now a few states that have a field on the real estate disclosure form specifically for neighborly noise issues and complaints!

How to get out from under the ugly situation

When you are selling a house with a noisy neighbor you may find many buyers are not willing to give you an offer. 

So where can you find a solution to sell your house?

Talk to the friendly team at Watson Buys. 

We buy houses no matter the situation. We will purchase your property despite the nose your neighbor is creating. 

Watson Buys houses no matter how bad the noise is. Funnily enough, though, we get more people wanting to sell apartments because of noise over houses.  

Doesn’t matter though because we buy apartments too! Bingo! We’ll buy your apartment, townhouse, condo, or any property type that has a noise problem.

We’ll buy your property, for cash, and as quickly as you need so you can move away from this ugly situation. 

The sooner you tell us you need to sell the sooner you can take your cash and find some peace and quiet

Does that sound like a plan?

Fill out the form below to get your cash offer started today!

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Colorado Noise Statute: Rules and regulations around noise in Colorado.

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